Using Cue Words to Stay Motivated

Woman Doing Yoga Exercises In Gym, Sport Fitness Girl Sitting Lotus PoseUsing Cue Words to Stay Motivated
Lately I have been playing around with the voices in my head. OK, I admit, that sounds rather strange, but follow me for a minute. We all talk to ourselves. I think I probably talk to myself non-stop throughout the day when I am not engaged in an actual conversation with another person. I would love to have a transcript of all the things I say to myself throughout the day. I am guessing I am not alone on this.

Do you talk to yourself? What does the voice sound like? Is it generally pleasant, or it is mean and critical? One way we have a positive effect on our goals is by changing up the way we talk to ourselves, using cue words. I will admit, I won’t be able to change all the negative voices in your head in one article, however, cue words are a very effective way to easily help us stay on track with our goals.

Here is an example of how the process of developing cue words can work. This week I have been rather busy studying for finals. When I study, I feel extra snacky. I want snacks!!! The café cookies and brownies were looking extra good this day. I took a moment to check in with my body and really connect with my cravings. Urge surfing is a technique that I walk through with my clients in session that have challenges with snacking. So I checked in with my body and I said to my body, what is this feeling? Then I noticed I said to myself: “I feel unsettled.” I took a deep breath and did some brief mindfulness and I said to myself “Settle in.” Ahhhhh!! Instantly I relaxed and felt better. I repeated settle in a few times and the craving went away.

Now you can use this technique to help with cravings, to motivate yourself for a workout, or any other behavior that you are wanting a little extra motivation with. Cue words are usually used in a performance context, but I tweaked it, because those of us on a fitness journey of sculpting our bodies have additional challenges with our sport or lifestyle when it comes to hunger.
 

Step 1: Identify an area that you want to have more motivation with. It could be to workout, to eat healthy.

Step 2: Connect with the feeling. It is good to do this in real time. For example, if you are not wanting to go to the gym, do this right then on the spot. Check in with your feeling and ask yourself: “What is this feeling about?” Or something like that. Take a few moments to connect with it.

Step 3: Take a few nice deep breaths and you wait for the communication from your body. Relax into whatever the feeling is.

Step 4: Identify a cue word based on how you feel. For example, I was feeling unsettled, so I said to myself settle in.

Step 5: Repeat your cue word several times to test the effectiveness. If it is not very strong, repeat the steps and create a new cue word.

Step 6: Write your cue word down and use it as often as you like for similar situations.

That’s it, that’s all there is to it. I hope you enjoy this technique and find it helpful especially now at a very tempting time of the year. I like to say, if you can eat healthy this time of year, you can do it anytime.

Also be sure to visit my audios if you are wanting some extra motivation in this potentially challenging time of the year. Here is the link:

And if you are interested in some personalized attention, check out my customized programs. I would be happy to offer you a complete custom nutrition plan along with all the mental tricks custom to your situation. 

Until next time,

Nancy Georges

IFBB Figure Pro
Contest Prep Coach
Mental Game Coach

How To Win Every Competition

 

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The Mental Game of Winning

Fitness, Figure, Bodybuilding, Bikini Competitors
(applicable to other sports as well)

Every competitor has the goal of winning a competition. The problem is, only one athlete walks away with the overall title. So how do you make sure that every competition you enter, you win? One way to make sure you win is to set up a variety of goals. I like to have the goal of winning, obviously, but I also like to include goals that are within my control.

One of the greatest boosts to self-confidence for sport is feeling like you have control over your process. I like to set goals for my level of conditioning, communication with others during contest prep, mental skill that I want to work on, level of focus in my workouts, feeling joyful about the process, eating my meals on schedule daily, weekly and monthly and more. All of these goals we have control over.

When we feel in control of our process, we get to win every day! The outcome of the competition is almost irrelevant, but I have never had a good journey that did not have a good ending. Creating goals throughout the competition process, whether that be for three months or six months, is a great way to enjoy and win every step of the way. At the end of the day, we are challenging ourselves to become a better version of who we are. That does not get measured for twelve weeks, it only gets measured one time, on one day. Here are some ideas for setting winning goals

Setting Winning Goals

1. Set Outcome Goals: An outcome goal is the result of your efforts. The most popular outcome goal for competitors is to win. I like to make other outcome goals such as surpassing the level of conditioning I was at in previous competitions. Sometimes I like to make outcome goals of meeting a certain amount of competitors at the show that I connect with. Outcome goals are the easiest to set, but keep in mind there are other outcomes to measure besides winning. Shorter range outcome goals include hitting target weight, measurement and body fat markers, being able to do a certain amount of cardio, having a specific amount of strength and endurance for your workout. Most outcome goals can be measured by, you guessed it, the outcome.

2. Set Performance Goals: Much of our performance is in the gym, therefore our pre-performance is very important. Eating our food on schedule, taking our supplements, and drinking the proper amount of water each day are all performance goals so to speak. We have an interesting sport that unlike many others, needs to be thought about throughout the day in order to create success. When we set and meet goals of eating our food on schedule, not skipping meals or snacking, this is the foundation for creating the physique of a champion. We will not get to our outcome if we do not have this setup. I like to make daily and weekly goals for how many workouts I will do, how many cardio sessions, as well as when or if I will have a treat meal. Other performance goals include contest day, how you will do on stage, which can also be broken down into smaller daily and weekly goals.

3. Set Procedural Goals: Procedural goals are perhaps the most overlooked goals. In our sport it is important for our shape to have a certain look to it, for that reason, it is important to create goals within our training that change the process of the workout in order to hit the muscle more effectively. I spend a lot of time with my clients viewing videos of their form, to make sure that not just the exercise is being done, but it is also being done in such a way as to maximize the look of the muscle. This is one example of a procedural goal. There is also a most effective breathing that goes with the workout depending on what you are doing, you can set goals very specific in this way to improve your effectiveness in the gym. It seems micromanaging, but it really is the difference that makes a difference. Everybody works out, but at the end of the day it is how you go about doing it, that matters.

4. Set Short, Medium and Long-Term Goals: When goal setting, many athletes focus simply on the outcome of getting to the stage and winning, but they don’t consider the wins they can be creating every week and every day. Break your goals down into short, medium and long-term goals. For our sport, I find it useful to have daily goals, weekly goals and a long term competition goal. My daily goals will often include for example: 5 minutes of mindfulness, 40 minutes of AM cardio, weight workout, eating my meals on schedule, having a positive attitude, feeling grateful for the process. Those might be my goals for the day. When I nail down the mindfulness for example, I may add the next day 5 minutes of visualization and have different behavioral goals depending on how my day was before that. When I lay my head on my pillow at night and I know I have had a successful day based on my goals; that is a win! I get a trophy. Do that over and over each and every day and I can’t guarantee you will win, but I can guarantee, you will feel like a winner!

5. Visit Your Goals Often and Be Open to Change Them: Having the flexibility to change goals is as important as setting the goal itself. Most often I find we think that something will take less time than it actually does. Be open and flexible to change your show date, increase or decrease performance and process goals and to in general be flexible to re-assess to see if you are still on target for the date you have selected. Many athletes feel like a failure if they change the date of their show. Nonsense! If you need more time, create more time by re-adjusting your goals. There will always be another show, so why not move forward toward your goals with success every step of the way? Win every day!

I am sure you have thought of other goals to include. If you want, create a list of short, medium and long-term outcome, performance and process goals. Then pick the most important one to work on. Once you have mastered that, move on to the next goal, while keeping the previous goal in check. This is a fun way to have a good contest prep, not just for the day of the show, but for the entire journey.

Nancy
http://www.nancygeorges.com

References:

Hanton, S., Mellalieu, S., & Williams, J. (2013). Understanding and managing stress in sport. In   J.M. Williams & V. Krane (Eds.), Applied sport psychology: Personal growth to peak performance (p. 207-234). New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.

Pope-Rhodius, A. (2016, October 25). Lecture. JFKU

Robinson, S. (2016, October 25). Lecture. JFKU

 

 

Focusing on Your Strengths

As appreciators of physical and mental excellence, it is easy for us to get overly involved in focusing on weakness. This is especially true for those of us who compete or simply want to improve a body part or two. Instead of looking at how beautiful our biceps are, we tend to focus on that belly, or that little extra fat in the bum. It makes sense because part of how we got to the level of excellence we are at is by looking at flaws and working on improving them.

But what if we play just for a minute with our strengths? What would that be like if you knew your strengths? What if you could tap into those strengths at a moment’s notice whenever you were feeling down on yourself or in a bit of a rut? Sometimes we can get obsessive and our negative focus takes a downward spiral and we have trouble digging ourselves out of a hole. But, if we know our strengths, then we can tap into those and utilize them to empower us and make our lives better in a more enriching way.
So here are some ideas to tap into your strengths and find out what it is you are really good at.
  1. Think about a time when you were most like you?
    What were you doing? What were you experiencing? What qualities did you poses when you were most like you? Write it out if you like and get a really good idea. Jot down maybe 5-10 characteristics or strengths that you really felt resonated with you during this time.
  2. Answer the following questions:
    What are you good at? What do people compliment you on? What are you most proud of about your personality?
  3. How do you get through challenging times?
    Think about a time when you were challenged. How did you overcome this challenge? What resources did you access in order to pull yourself out and get through this challenging situation? Write out 5-10 different strengths that you used to help yourself in this situation.
  4. Create a top 10 character strengths.
    Much like we create a list of values, we can also create a list of strengths so that we can be contentious of them at any moment and use them as a resource to empower us.
  5. Take the Character Strengths Survey:
    The survey is based on the work of Martin Seligman and Positive Psychology. It is an empirically tested list of the top 24 character strengths universal to humans. There are no weaknesses according to the model, only strengths that you identify with more and strengths you identify with less.
Focusing on our strengths allows us to tap into our natural resources when we are in a bind. Understanding our strengths is the first step to using them. When we utilize our strengths we feel more empowered to live the life that we choose.

Visualization Exercise to Increase Motivation to Achieve Fitness Goals

This visualization exercise to increase motivation includes the goal setting segment. easy visualization exercise to help increase your motivation to achieve your goals. I made the mental exercise as vague as possible to be for any event, competition, wedding, photo shoot, important business meeting, vacation, you fill in the good stuff, I guide you on the journey.

Download the worksheet:
Link to PodBean Episode

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The Mental Edge: Aligning Values for Peak Performance

People often ask me how I make the process of sticking to a regimented nutrition and training program so easy. The short answer has always been that I make it fun. I like to say, if it is not fun, I am not doing it. And that’s the truth. I competed for 20 years and it was always fun. The only show that was not fun was my last one. That’s how I knew it was time to pursue other endeavors.

But is prepping food every morning for an hour really fun? Is eating practically the same food every day really fun. Is waking up before the sun does to do cardio really fun? This has been difficult for me to articulate to people how exactly I make the process fun. The key to having a successful and enjoyable journey toward any fitness endeavor is to act from a place of values rather than emotions.

Our emotions can be so strong. Sometimes they come at us with reckless abandon encouraging us to lay on the couch because we deserve to relax. Our emotions tell us to have some popcorn with our family because it feels so good to snuggle in and laugh with a big family size bowl of buttered yumminess. According to Hayes, Strosahl, and Wilson (2012) the co-creators of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, when we are able to act from our values instead of our emotions, we can have and honor our feelings and at the same time act from a place of integrity with what is really important.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself the next time you are feeling emotional and are ready to act from a place of emotion rather than from your values.

  1. What is really important to me here?
  2. What do I want my (fitness journey, contest prep, weight loss, etc.) to be about?
  3. What is this emotion letting me know is important to me?
  4. What is the big picture of what I am creating in my life?
  5. What are my top ten values and how does my goal help me live those values day to day?

When we live from a place of values, we get to live with purpose in the moment. We are not waiting for some time in the future when we can have x, y or z. When we live from our values, we get to feel good about honoring what is important at a deeper level and not just what will make us feel good in that moment.

It is also a great idea to frequently update big picture values such as honesty, personal development, integrity, passion, authenticity. This helps us to consider what is overall most important so that we can leave from a deeper place without being reactive to our day to day feelings.

Getting back to the example of getting up early to do cardio and making food, when we come from a place of values it is easy to take action that moves us in the direction of our goals. I think about my WHY. Why am I doing this? That helps me to be motivated and also to enjoy the process.

I hope this has been helpful if you have been struggling with making the journey fun. Think about your values, and I promise you will be saying it is easy too.

Until next month,

Nancy

Reference:
Hayes, S., Strosahl, K., & Wilson, K. (2012) Acceptance and commitment therapy. New York, NY: The Guilford Press.

 

The Mental Edge: Mindset For Peak Performance

My apologies for not getting a newsletter out for January and February. 2016 has already been an extremely busy year. I am just putting the finishing touches on my gorgeous office in Sacramento. I will have more info on this in my newsletter next month. I am very excited about offering Sports Performance Coaching in person, where you can get live hands-on coaching and hypnotherapy for peak performance. I am hoping to do a video newsletter next month from my office.

This month I want to focus on peak performance. The trend of spring is for many athletes to start getting ready for competition. But how do you focus on mental excellence when there seems to be so many distractions that are pulling for your attention? For those of you mentally getting focused, this newsletter is for you.

Mindset For Peak Performance

Deciding to commit to the mental side of being an athlete is not for everyone. It means no more excuses, no more blaming others, and no more waiting for someone to give you a pep talk to motivate you to work out. It means doing what needs to be done regardless of whether you want to or not. But as many people know, I am not one for suffering. I aspire to commit to excellence AND enjoy the process completely. I have a few secrets for success. They are simple in principle, but not so easy to master. Here they are, just in time to boost your level of excellence above and beyond what you thought was possible.

  1. Commit to Excellence: Just words on a page, commit to excellence. But what does that really mean? It means going to the gym when you are tired, prepping your food when you are busy, getting your sleep when you want to watch a movie, saying no to activities that go against your goals. Sometimes committing to excellence can be lonely. It’s that little voice in your head that says: “You can relax and take a break, no-one will know.” It is ignoring that voice and doing the work anyway. It is doing what needs to be done without needing accolades from others that you made your meals for a day, or got through one workout. Committing to excellence is an internal state of mind and no external high fives will offer peace of mind. The only peace of mind is laying your head on your pillow at night, knowing in your heart, you did what you could to achieve your goal.
  2. Make peace with the process: When I am dieting I am in love with the process. I love prepping my food, organizing my supplements, and preparing myself for the day. I make peace with getting a little less sleep so I can do my morning cardio. I make peace with the several hours a day it takes to make my food. I make peace with the late night workouts. The process becomes my friend. Embrace the process and your journey will become magical.
  3. PMA – Positive Mental Attitude: I learned about PMA when I was on the high school swim team and we beat a team that had been undefeated for over 20 years. Our coach instilled a belief in us that we could do it. Believe in yourself and have a positive attitude. Your journey will be more enjoyable and more successful. It’s ok to not believe you can do it, keep on doing the work anyway and allow your mind to develop into the belief that you will accomplish your goal. One step at a time and you will go from being not sure if you can, to thinking you can, to knowing you can. Hey, that sounds a bit like The Little Engine That Could. 
  4. Talk it out: When in doubt, talk it out. Sometimes we just need someone to listen to us. We need a safe place to go to feel supported and listened to. Find the people that support you and be sure to reach out when you are in need of a little understanding. It is no secret that I see a sports psychologist, and have for almost a year now. This support has meant the world to me. To be able to talk about my goals and dreams and frustrations along the way has been priceless.
  5. Have fun: If it is not fun, I am not doing it. Sometimes if we are really pushing up against a brick wall, w need to take a step back and really check in and ask ourselves, how can we have fun with this process? Can we have fun? What needs to change in my attitude? How can I enjoy myself while striving for peak performance?

I hope you have found my top 5 mindset tricks helpful. Let me know if any of them resonated with you, or if you have one of your own that you would like to share. I would love to hear from you. Until next month,

Nancy

Mental Edge: How To Make The Most Out of Interpersonal Relationships

The holidays are here. It is time for parties, family gatherings, and social engagements galore! I know many people don’t look forward to the amount of socializing that goes on around this time of year. For one thing, we socialize with people that we only see a few times a year, and getting conversations going can be a bit awkward. On top of that, we have gatherings that are more business in nature, and we are meeting people for the first time. Getting those conversations going, can also sometimes seem challenging.

And then there is that Aunt, who is stuck in the past that every year reminds the entire family of all the embarrassing things they did when they were ten years old. I feel you. It can make one want to sneak away and hide in a bottle and go numb to it all.

But I have a proposal, a challenge if you will. Live each event to the fullest. Be the life of the party, engage enthusiastically, strike up conversations that are stimulating to other people, and leave people feeling good for having interacted with you. Whether that is your sister, step cousin, or that random stranger that one of your family members invited so that they too have a place to go for the holidays.

What if we challenged ourselves in a new way, to live each event as if it were the only thing important in life? What if we gave an overhaul to our social skills and our family etiquette? If you are up for the challenge, here are a few ideas to get things going.

1. Accept others for who they are. It is my opinion that one of the most important ways we can have meaningful interactions is to accept that others are different from us. Some are VERY different. It’s all good, right? We don’t want little clones of ourselves do we; that agree with everything we say no matter what and never challenge us? I don’t think that would be interesting at all. So next party, clear your mind of all that you believe about people and just come in as a blank slate, open to some interesting and engaging conversations.

2. Get interested in their unique story. Once we come in as a blank slate and accept others as they are, it is much easier to become curious about people. When someone is different, be curious rather than judgmental. Think of it as an amazing opportunity to try on someone else’s life for the fun of it and then giving it back at the end of the conversation. Ask engaging questions that will get them excited. Play a game to see how much better of a mood you can leave them in than when they started talking to you.

3. Be the happy person in the room. I don’t recall where this advice came from, maybe it is an old Taoist saying, but people remember you based on how you made them feel. That to me is so wild. Here we are thinking we need to impress people with our fancy dress and perfect makeup, and it turns out, when they feel good after interacting with us, they also feel more positively toward us. It is a win win deal as far as I can tell. You feel good for allowing yourself to be in such a good mood and interact with positivity, and they feel good for the positive interaction. And based on my experience, that positivity will become contagious real quick.

4. Balance family time with alone time. Our schedules are usually tighter than normal over the holidays, be sure to find time for yourself. Even if you have to scale it back from your usual hour a day to 30 minutes a day, at least you are doing something to turn inward and connect with yourself and check in with how you feel and recharge your mind and body.

5. Realize that the only moment that ever matters in life is this moment right now. Or is it this moment now? Or this one? Or maybe this one? Well, you get the point. The past is done and over with, and the future will never arrive. Spend this holiday season in the present, enjoying each moment as it comes.

Make a personal challenge to yourself, to improve your interpersonal relationships. Get to know someone on a deeper level, or maybe several people. Any bit that you do to stay engaged, positive and present will make each holiday event and gather that much more full of spirit and joy. And I think that is what the season is all about, joy.

Wishing you a wonderful holiday full of love and connection,

Nancy

Mental Edge: If You Don’t Take Care of Yourself, Who Will?

5 Keys To Improve Self-Care

Is there ever a good time to slow down? Do we appreciate people telling us to relax and not worry so much when there is so much to get done? I know I don’t. It’s like someone telling you to smile when you were perfectly pleased with the face you had on. However, stress creeps in little by little and before you know it, our time is not our own anymore. It is not until we tell ourselves to slow down that we usually listen.

Rather than offering some suggestions for slowing down, I thought it would be more beneficial to focus on what to do, rather than what not to do. Here are my top five ways of improving self-care. You may or may not chose to slow down the pace, but ultimately what matters is our peace of mind along with positive mental and emotional well being.


1. Learn how to get your needs met:
Getting our needs met is relatively easy. Most people close to us will have no problem meeting our needs; that is if we can articulate them. One simple way of getting our needs met is to ask ourselves the simple question: “What do I need right now.” Simple, yes, easy to implement, not so much. It requires a cognitive process that we become aware that we are compensating our behavior in some way to meet a need that is a substitute for the real need. I think we can all relate to the desire for deep, meaningful connection, only to find ourselves in the bottom of a pint of Ben and Jerry’s thinking, where is it? It does require effort, but effort well worth the investment. When our real needs are met, we make less substitutions like overeating, over working, drinking, overspending, gossiping, watching too much TV or spending too much time on the internet, just to name a few of my favorites.

2. Know when to say no: We may think that every opportunity that comes our way is an important magnum opus to take on. Truth be told if we connect with our true values, what is important easily outshines the less important opportunities that end up being energy draining in the long run. Personally, I have a list of my top ten values in mind at all times to make sure my decisions and actions are values based.

3. Scale back rather than eliminate: This is my favorite method as it relates to exercise and proper nutrition. Many people when stress or crisis starts to come toward them at an accelerated pace, end up neglecting exercise because it is not reasonable to do it as often. The same holds true for proper nutrition. Sometimes we need to travel or go to several parties in a row, but that doesn’t mean we need to stop completely. I like to scale workouts back to an amount that I will feel successful doing. Maybe that is two or three times a week, that is fine, it is better than zero times.

4. Be content with close enough: This is a hard one to implement in a society that force feeds us that we need to persist with our goals with passion and not settling for less. But let’s face it, there is a point where we can say we are simply close enough. We don’t need to be so anal retentive and strive for perfection. I remember when I first started college I would squabble about getting a 95% on a paper or a test, and then I realized, it is still an A, close enough. It is not like I need to get to 100%. I can focus my energy somewhere else.

5. Establish your sacred time: I love my sacred time. There is very little that interferes with my one hour weekly sessions with my sports psychologist and my active release specialist. These are two people that I trust to help me stay connected and grounded with who I am, what I am about, and where I am going. It is like a weekly tune up for my mind and body. Find something sacred for you, maybe it is yoga, meditation, a weekly cup of coffee with your favorite friend, or an extra-long nap every Sunday afternoon. Finding sacred time is very important in my opinion. It sends your unconscious mind the message that you are important and worth investing in, whatever way you do that.

I was starting to feel a little of the neurotic holiday energy, so I decided to re-group and gather my resources for self-care. I hope you also find the timing right for you. I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. It is my favorite holiday, spending time with people I love eating delicious food. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Until next time,

Nancy

November 2015: What is Mental Fitness? Connecting, Receving and Transforming Our Emotions

If you followed my pre-contest diet without a contest video series, you are aware that I have recently intentionally put myself through a mental transformation. Having been a fitness and figure competitor for 20 years, it was pretty easy for me to dial in a diet and let go of the security blanket of hiding my emotions through food. It was quite a transformative process. And even though many people were very curious about what I was eating and how much weight I was losing (naturally), I was more interested in the transformation that was happing inside my mind.

I think part of why we all love to do physical transformations is that we get to see the fruits of our labor visually. We see the number on a scale go down, we see needing smaller pants, we get the accolades from others that we are looking good. But what happens when we go through a mental transformation? We don’t get social feedback about that very often. “Wow Janet, it is so nice to see that you are taking a nicer tone with your internal dialog.” Or “I am so glad to feel you not hating on me today.” Although we can often feel when our energy is closed off to someone else, and we can also feel when someone’s energy is closed off to us, we can’t quite quantify it as easily as we can with the stuff that makes up or physical transformation. It is not ubiquitous, and, therefore, I think we tend to overlook the importance of feeling great and settle for just looking great. But I have never worked with a client that a physical transformation alone was enough to help make a mental transformation. They always had an intent to make the journey both physical as well as mental.

With competition season closing shop, for the most part, and many people hiding under their baggy sweaters and sweatshirts, I think winter is the perfect time to incorporate both a physical as well as mental transformation. No, your friends probably won’t comment on your emotional well-being, but hey, not every life changing event is for show and tell.

So how do we even begin to quantify an emotional transformation? What specifically do we work on improving? How do we know when we have arrived? Or do we arrive? What goals do we set? How do we monitor if we are making progress? Seems a bit overwhelming doesn’t it? I hope to simplify the process right now.

Setting goals in your emotional world is very similar to setting goals in your physical world. A good starting point is as easy as asking: What do I want? You can compartmentalizes, for example, what do I want in my relationships, my work, my health and wellness, my spirituality, etc. Or you can think of a general direction of your goals of what you want. Next ask yourself, what emotions are getting in my way of me getting what I want? Write down your limiting beliefs, thoughts, and emotions that seem to get in the way. Third, set the tone for allowing yourself to experience these emotions. This is the not so easy part, and this is precisely the point where we go into distraction mode with food, internet, TV or some other activity that will distract us from how we feel. But, if we can take a moment to allow it to be present and to appreciate these emotions.

My philosophy is that all emotions that feel bad serve a purpose. There is a message behind the emotions. If we allow ourselves to feel the emotion, then we can do the final step that is where the transformation takes place, and that is receiving the message from the negative emotion. I will simply have a conversation with myself and say: “What message does this emotion have for me?” When I ask the question, I then sit into the emotion and let it express whatever wants to happen. That is not to say I won’t have this emotion again, but at least now, I have a transformative understanding of the message of the emotion, and now I have befriended my so called negative emotion rather than rejecting it. Here is a quick outline for reference:

  1. What do I want? Create goals in any area of your life. They can be relationship goals, career goals, health and wellness goals, or any goals that are a priority in your life right now.
  2. What emotions are in my way of me getting what I want? Write down limiting beliefs, negative thoughts and self-critical internal dialog.
  3. Allow the “negative” emotion to come up without distracting yourself from it.
  4. Receive the message from the emotion. You can ask: “What message does this emotion have for me?”

With a better understanding of the meaning of our emotions, we can have good ones and bad ones and feel a sense of connectedness to our inner experience without being judgmental and critical of thoughts and feelings that don’t feel good. Emotions that feel bad serve a purpose; they have a message for us. The trick is to allow ourselves to me in a receptive state to receive the message and let in our highest desire.

Until Next Month,

Nancy
www.nancygeorges.com